Fall....

Fall....if we may call it such in South Florida....is my favorite time of the year. Their is a certain "nostalgia" that I begin to feel when the sun sets a little earlier, when the temperatures are not scorching hot, and when the air softens a bit. Ever since I can rememer I've loved the Fall. Those from the North would tell me "but this is not really Fall!" And I agree-no leaves changing and falling to the ground. We do not experience drops in temperature that merit sweater wearing, nor do we turn off our air conditioners. Yet the fact that Halloween is around the corner and we will be changing our clocks soon is enough for me to feel that melancholic feeling of a year coming to an end. This was a year of extremes for me. It was the most challenging for me healthwise and it was the most rewarding careerwise. It was also the year that I realized I had grown up! I remember talking to my childhood friends about what kind of lives we would have-oh how we would plan on being sooo different from our parents. Little did we know that although we would do somethings differently, in our core we became our parents! I so miss my high school years...the people I was friendly with...the carefree life that then I didn't realize I had. Sometimes I get an ache for those years. I only wish that this season would not lead to the rush rush of the Christmas holiday. I am going to make it a point this year to slow down and enjoy the moments-as opposed to how it has been in the past that before we realize it-the holidays are over!

The Lost City

Today I watched Andy Garcia's The Lost City probably for the third time. It made me feel emotions that I've felt before, yet I've never put into words. As a child of an immigrant mother from Cuba, I have always been very much the loss of this lost city called Havana, yet I am only coming to the realization of the enormity of what happened to my family in my adult years. As a matter of fact, I tried so hard to be American in my growing up years many times denying my heritage. How silly! I guess it was a child's need to fit in. I mention this because I ask myself "How will Ling-Ling feel when she is at the age that I was when I denied my heritage?" For her it will be so much harder-she will not be able to "mix in" as easily as I did due to her Chinese looks. I want to make sure that she will never be ashamed or feel that she must hide her birthplace. Everytime she looks in the mirror she will be faced with it. I do not blame my mother for my feeling the way I did, she was trying to survive in a country that was so foreign to her-having left behind the man that she was in love with (my father) so that I could have a better life. I just can't help but meditate on the heritage that is "lost" to me. In Garcia's movie, he has to leave behind a mother and father that loved him, a lifestyle that was intrinsic to being Cuban. For me, I did not have to make such a difficult choice, yet I commiserate with my mother and grandmother for it had to have been oh so heart-breaking for them. I will never understand their plight-yet I can mourn for a life I never had. I so wish I could go back to those times and experience a slice of life that my mother and grandmother did....I feel strangely nostalgic for her past. I also admire the courage that she and many of my friend's parents had in starting over in this wonderful country. I wonder if I would have been brave or strong enough to do the same?

It's been a while....

I've been very very busy with school and learning the ropes of chairing the department. Lots of new things to worry about, but all in all, it has been wonderful. I work with 11 other very different and strong people. We are known as the "difficult" department at school, but I also know that we are the most dynamic and efficient. Everyone is really great at what they do (well, mostly everyone). Professionally, this has turned out to be a pretty good year for me-at least thus far. I love the courses I'm teaching...and the kids are really great.

There is still no news on the Ling Ling front. The last we heard is that China has matched people through February 9th-we are end of March so we are almost there. We don't really talk about it-at least not until it becomes a reality.

I will write more soon-I won't be missing in action again

It's Over...

Me on a camel on the day we went into Jerusalem.

Yes,

Tomorrow I go BACK TO SCHOOL. Wasn't it only yesterday that I was looking forward to surgery and my trip to Israel? What happened? Where did time go? Scary! But I find that I am very much looking forward to beginning a new school year. My classroom is ready-I went in to work a couple of days last week so that I could be ready with that aspect of my job-Now I can focus on the department and the new teacher stuff. I have so many plans for my department! I really want us to be the very best in the school! Sounds corny doesn't it? I do know that I have to begin with just getting us organized...

I went on Facebook and found a long "lost" friend. I'll write a whole blog on that later.....

Today I saw that the LID date that was matched in China was 1/27/06. Only 2 days of matching in the whole month! Unbelievable. DH very frustrated by this date too.

It's almost over

Where has summer gone? I remember the days when it was 3 months off for the summer...the lazy days of beach, camp, and play. Or was it that my perceptions as a kid are seen through "rose-colored glasses"? I am already getting ready to get my department up and running for the new school year. I have a sense of anticipation and hope for a new school year. It really is a new beginning and a fresh start. Yet, I do feel that the summer has very quickly gone by. I know that in the north, school still does not start until after Labor day...that's how it used to be when I was a kid. Now, in the state of Florida we begin in mid August-our first day this year will be August 11 for faculty and August 18 for the student body. That is really early! Hopefully this beginning will not be marked by the usual hurricanes that usually get us in a panic. (The kids sure do love those hurricane days) I heard from a very old friend today-apparently she got in touch with one of our old school mates-MJ-we haven't heard from her in over 15 years! I can't wait to see what she's up to...
In the meantime, I am going to enjoy every moment of the final days of freedom I have left!

I'm Baaack!

It's hard to believe that I was counting down the days before my trip and now in the blink of an eye....I'm back. It was simply amazing! I cannot begin to express just how overwhelming an experience it was to visit the Holy Land. I did just fine on the airplane rides...just a little nervous at take-offs and landings. I flew on a prop plane for the very firt time between Baltimore and Newark-that was scary! Jet lag really kicked my butt, but the experience was wonderful. The Anti-defamation league took care of us as if we were dignitaries. I've never seen such respect and admiration shown to teachers. We met many that are trying to make a difference in the lives of children that are in war torn areas. Why don't we hear about that in the news? My visit to Yad VaShem (Holocaust Museum) was one of the most impactful for me. I will absolutely try to return there. Can you imagine hearing Sunday Mass in the church of the Holy Sepulcher? I did-and feel as if such a gift was given me. I know that I haven't yet realized processed all aspects of this experience, but I am truly grateful to have been chosen to participate in this seminar that will make me a better teacher. This picture was taken while we were sailing on the Sea of Galilee-I really have to pinch myself to believe that I really lived this experience!

Two Weeks and Counting....

I leave for Baltimore on July 6th! Cannot wait...although I HATE (AM TERRIFIED OF) flying. It seems ridiculous for me to be so phobic about getting on an airplane in light of how many miles I've logged during the last 4 years, but I really wish there was a better way of getting from point A to point B. I'm always so sure it's going to be the one that does me in, but alas I will not allow that fear to stop me from going to spectacular places. It has been two weeks since school ended yet I feel that my summer vacation just started. Before I know it I'll be back in school....yuck! Although I've been doing much to prepare the department for a smooth start in August. I want to get much accomplished this week-but I'm still very sore from surgery. I hope to feel better by the time I have to leave! I can't imagine carting the luggage through the airport and hotel rooms and feeling so sore! But everything will work out-I'm sure of it. I have a doctor's follow up appointment tomorrow, so I'll see what he says about the soreness. I also want to ask him if it's ok for me to swim in the Dead Sea-I would think it's theraputic? Hopefully he will say all is well. I found a mom of two of my students that is adopting from China. She got her referral for her baby and will be leaving for China at the end of this week! I'm so excited for her...what is ironic is that she has two older kids - as I do- her youngest and my youngest graduated from high school together, and now we are both embarking on "starting over" as so many people tell me. I don't see it as starting over at all!!! I see it as a continuation of my life's goals. Ever since I can remember, my mom used to talk about this little Chinese girl that she had "sponsored/adopted" when she was young in Cuba. From what I understand, the process was that you took on this baby girl that was in an orphanage in China and you paid for her welfare throughout her life. My mom would receive pictures and updates of her little girl throughout the time that she was in the program. Then came Fidel Castro and the rest is history. Her story really began my awareness and later my yen (no pun intented) to adopt a little girl from China. It seems like our wait is getting shorter-this week they announced the referrals of all LIDs through Jan 22. Our's is March 23. Soon soon......